When I began planning for Nepal back in October, I knew without a doubt that I wanted to spend majority of my time volunteering in an orphanage. Nepal is the third poorest country in the world after Congo and Liberia and millions of people go without proper nutrition, drinking water and safe place to go at the end of the day. There are hundreds of orphanages throughout Nepal, choosing just one was not easy but in the short three week period I had in Nepal, I knew at this time I was just going to have to choose one and dedicate myself fully to just the one at this present time.
Once I arrived to Nepal, I first had to recover from severe ‘dehli belly’ which robbed me of time which I would have rather spent in the orphanage, but one must first take care of themselves before being fully capable of helping others. Luckily, I recovered quite quickly and was able to get myself over to the orphanage. The children (8 in total) greeted me with much joy. They were beautiful, full of life and my heart just swelled with love. After a week with the children, I decided to leave for a few days and travel around Nepal, yet I missed all the children so much I decided to return and spend my final week in the orphanage. The head ‘auntie’ offered me a bed, dalbhaat (lentil soup with rice) for breakfast and dinner, in exchange for a small fee.
The morning after the first night I slept there I spent reading with the children and working on math and other subjects. It was truly heartwarming to spend the morning with a group of bubbly eight, nine and ten year olds. After reading time we ate breakfast and the children prepared themselves for school and out the door they went. I decided to spend the day exploring temples and buying some gifts for friends and family at home. I found the perfect gift for one friend and as I reached into my wallet to grab out the money to pay, I discovered that only 1000 rupees remained. I had just gone to the ATM the previous day and pulled out my remaining 10,000 rupees for the remainder of my trip, planning half would go for accommodations and the other half for the airport tax and taxi to airport. Also, I discovered my Indian rupees were also missing, which was the remaining amount I had to get through India, all the large (1,000 bills) were missing and the remaining small bills were still there.
My first thought was that I must have spent more money than I thought, but then I assured myself that I had just taken the money out and I had only purchased a few small things (water, a gift for a friend and some tissues), which did not add up for the amount of money missing. Then I questioned if I had dropped the money at any point, but also I assured myself that it was impossible since I had the money in two pockets, buried deep at the bottom of my bag. Next I considered a pickpocketer, but again, they would have taken all of it, not left me with the small bills. Finally after backtracking every step since I withdrew the money from the ATM I had only one remaining possibility- the orphanage.
I questioned this possibility and then thought it was impossible that these amazing children could actually steal money. For a while now I have been practicing non-attachment. I decided to just to accept that the money was gone and move on. Yet in the back of my mind I felt that maybe something needed to be done about this, I did not want the money back, and I just wanted to fix a problem that might escalate later. I decided to tell ‘auntie’ about my missing money. She immediately became very worried. She gathered all the children and queried them as a group if any had stolen my money. They all denied and a search began. Backpacks, books and their rooms were searched, but no money surfaced. I rapidly felt immense emotion as these children were being questioned. My mind started doubting myself again and these children were just so innocent and young. I went to bed that night unsure if I had made the right decision. But I choose to let it go, sleep and things would work at as they will in the morning.
The next morning ‘auntie’ went to their school and asked their classmates if any of them had seen money. None of the school children admitted anything. [In total, 3000-4000 Indian rupees ($60-80) and 6000-7000 Nepalese rupees ($85-100) went missing] Throughout the day, I began questioning whether it was not the children, rather the ‘auntie’ who had taken the money. I also learned during the day that another volunteer had had money stolen a total of three times within the past week as well, and it was the same situation as mine, only the large bills were taken, and the small bills remained. When ‘auntie’ returned home I decided to confront her. She became incredibly defensive and filled with anger. I asked her: then who? She pointed out one child directly and I asked if I could speak with him. He came up to the room filled with fear, I felt terrible, but I asked the child if he had stolen my money. I told him that if he had he could keep half the money for himself; I only needed enough to get me to the airport and airport tax. He confessed.
He then continued to tell me that he had snuck into my room at night and stolen the money. I asked him where he learned to steal and why? He hesitantly told me about another child at school who had told him to steal the money and bring it to him (to buy videogames). He also told me he already gave all the money to him and no longer had any of it. The ‘auntie’ was so furious she told him that he was being sent back home to his step-father first thing in the morning. The child sat paralyzed and his eyes began to swell with tears. (The last time the child went home to visit his family; he was returned cover in bruises from head to toe since his step-father beats him). I became scared and worried, and said that would not be necessary. He deserved one more chance, she said he received enough chances and this was his last. My heart was crushed and I just wanted to wake up from this nightmare.
I got up and hugged the child, I am not sure if this is appropriate, but in my culture it is. I told him everything was going to be ok. Unfortunately, I was not sure if that was the case. I do not care about the money—money comes and goes. The Universe has ways of taking care of me; I knew I would be alright. But would the child? I have trust and faith that everything is happening for a reason. I am not concerned with myself, but the well-being of the child is my only worry. I will not allow him to be returned home to a father that beats him and ends of destroying his life even further. I will just not allow it.
*Deep breath. In through the nose, filling my lungs and release through the mouth.
Everything is going to be ok. Or is it?
