Summer & Beyond

I have been in the United States for only a few days. There are numerous things that I have had to become adjusted to, such as-sleep. I never thought jetlag would happen to me, but my body does not know when to sleep and when not to sleep. My diet has changed slightly- since I am home its so much easier to eat even healthier than before. I have started some sprouts, and I am eating heaps more fermented foods and greens. My body usually LOVES these things, but at the moment I have to take it slowly. Today I was finally able to get my luggage and unpack. I have heaps of laundry I need to do and half my stuff is stained, ripped, and/or moldy, so I probably should part with most of it.

Although I am hardly settled, I am already pondering the question of what is next to come. Many people keep asking me if I am staying or going, and honestly, I am not sure.

I have numerous options:

1) Stay in OC, get a summer job here—already have had two separate job offers.

2) Work at Yosemite for the summer

3) Hang out a few more weeks in the OC and then head to MS to work for the summer.

4) Find money for a flight to Costa Rica—and start work there.

I have also been offered a spot as a guest teacher at a yoga school in Ohio.

Decisions, decisions. Story of my life.

Other things I am brooding on, for the next several months are:

1) I have seen so much of the world, yet there are a few places in my own country I have yet to see: The White House, Niagara Falls, I would really love to visit friends in: Birmingham, Nashville, Salt Lake City, Denver, Asheville, Charleston, Philadelphia, and Pittsburgh. I am thinking about hitching across the country and making stops in each of these locations. If I hitch, couchsurf and stay with friends it should cost me nearly zilch. I could just make a whole heap of muesli before I go and stock up on dried goods and hit the road! I am hoping to make this happen sometime in July.

2) Vancouver, Canada—I need to squeeze it in sometime this summer/autumn.

3) Central and/or South America: I have numerous job offers all throughout Central America. I am hoping to spend 5-6 months teaching yoga and reiki throughout the area. I would also like to meet up with friends in Mexico and South America. I am hoping to be in Latin America by the latest end of August.

4) Egypt, Israel and Jordan. I really really want to visit these three countries. Maybe early next year?

im ready to wake from this nightmare

When I began planning for Nepal back in October, I knew without a doubt that I wanted to spend majority of my time volunteering in an orphanage. Nepal is the third poorest country in the world after Congo and Liberia and millions of people go without proper nutrition, drinking water and safe place to go at the end of the day. There are hundreds of orphanages throughout Nepal, choosing just one was not easy but in the short three week period I had in Nepal, I knew at this time I was just going to have to choose one and dedicate myself fully to just the one at this present time.

Once I arrived to Nepal, I first had to recover from severe ‘dehli belly’ which robbed me of time which I would have rather spent in the orphanage, but one must first take care of themselves before being fully capable of helping others. Luckily, I recovered quite quickly and was able to get myself over to the orphanage. The children (8 in total) greeted me with much joy. They were beautiful, full of life and my heart just swelled with love. After a week with the children, I decided to leave for a few days and travel around Nepal, yet I missed all the children so much I decided to return and spend my final week in the orphanage. The head ‘auntie’ offered me a bed, dalbhaat (lentil soup with rice) for breakfast and dinner, in exchange for a small fee.

The morning after the first night I slept there I spent reading with the children and working on math and other subjects. It was truly heartwarming to spend the morning with a group of bubbly eight, nine and ten year olds. After reading time we ate breakfast and the children prepared themselves for school and out the door they went. I decided to spend the day exploring temples and buying some gifts for friends and family at home. I found the perfect gift for one friend and as I reached into my wallet to grab out the money to pay, I discovered that only 1000 rupees remained. I had just gone to the ATM the previous day and pulled out my remaining 10,000 rupees for the remainder of my trip, planning half would go for accommodations and the other half for the airport tax and taxi to airport. Also, I discovered my Indian rupees were also missing, which was the remaining amount I had to get through India, all the large (1,000 bills) were missing and the remaining small bills were still there.

My first thought was that I must have spent more money than I thought, but then I assured myself that I had just taken the money out and I had only purchased a few small things (water, a gift for a friend and some tissues), which did not add up for the amount of money missing. Then I questioned if I had dropped the money at any point, but also I assured myself that it was impossible since I had the money in two pockets, buried deep at the bottom of my bag. Next I considered a pickpocketer, but again, they would have taken all of it, not left me with the small bills. Finally after backtracking every step since I withdrew the money from the ATM I had only one remaining possibility- the orphanage.

I questioned this possibility and then thought it was impossible that these amazing children could actually steal money. For a while now I have been practicing non-attachment. I decided to just to accept that the money was gone and move on. Yet in the back of my mind I felt that maybe something needed to be done about this, I did not want the money back, and I just wanted to fix a problem that might escalate later. I decided to tell ‘auntie’ about my missing money. She immediately became very worried. She gathered all the children and queried them as a group if any had stolen my money. They all denied and a search began. Backpacks, books and their rooms were searched, but no money surfaced. I rapidly felt immense emotion as these children were being questioned. My mind started doubting myself again and these children were just so innocent and young. I went to bed that night unsure if I had made the right decision. But I choose to let it go, sleep and things would work at as they will in the morning.

The next morning ‘auntie’ went to their school and asked their classmates if any of them had seen money. None of the school children admitted anything. [In total, 3000-4000 Indian rupees ($60-80) and 6000-7000 Nepalese rupees ($85-100) went missing] Throughout the day, I began questioning whether it was not the children, rather the ‘auntie’ who had taken the money. I also learned during the day that another volunteer had had money stolen a total of three times within the past week as well, and it was the same situation as mine, only the large bills were taken, and the small bills remained. When ‘auntie’ returned home I decided to confront her. She became incredibly defensive and filled with anger. I asked her: then who? She pointed out one child directly and I asked if I could speak with him. He came up to the room filled with fear, I felt terrible, but I asked the child if he had stolen my money. I told him that if he had he could keep half the money for himself; I only needed enough to get me to the airport and airport tax. He confessed.

He then continued to tell me that he had snuck into my room at night and stolen the money. I asked him where he learned to steal and why? He hesitantly told me about another child at school who had told him to steal the money and bring it to him (to buy videogames). He also told me he already gave all the money to him and no longer had any of it. The ‘auntie’ was so furious she told him that he was being sent back home to his step-father first thing in the morning. The child sat paralyzed and his eyes began to swell with tears. (The last time the child went home to visit his family; he was returned cover in bruises from head to toe since his step-father beats him). I became scared and worried, and said that would not be necessary. He deserved one more chance, she said he received enough chances and this was his last. My heart was crushed and I just wanted to wake up from this nightmare.

I got up and hugged the child, I am not sure if this is appropriate, but in my culture it is. I told him everything was going to be ok. Unfortunately, I was not sure if that was the case. I do not care about the money—money comes and goes. The Universe has ways of taking care of me; I knew I would be alright. But would the child? I have trust and faith that everything is happening for a reason. I am not concerned with myself, but the well-being of the child is my only worry. I will not allow him to be returned home to a father that beats him and ends of destroying his life even further. I will just not allow it.

*Deep breath. In through the nose, filling my lungs and release through the mouth.

Everything is going to be ok. Or is it?

When in Rome, do as the Romans do

Or in my case, ‘when in Nepal, do as the Nepalese do...’

I choose to spend my first seven days in a home stay with a traditional Nepalese family. I choose this option for two main reasons; first, I wanted to experience the real Nepal and Nepalese lifestyle first hand, this was a great opportunity for me to understand the local culture, language, activities, and customs. Second, I knew the family was very poor and my contribution could help house and feed the entire family (which consists of a mom and her two teenage children).

The family survives off $2 US/per day. The family has no fridge, no electricity and no drinking water. They boil the water from the tap (which only comes out during certain peak hours and is an organish brown color) and boil it for consumption. They shower once a week, on Saturdays, and to do so the mom fills a pot with water, brings it to a boil, then they cleanse themselves out of the pot. They share one bedroom and once the sun sets they then use flashlights to get around, since there is no electricity. However, they typically retire around 730 in the evening, since there is not much else to do. They sleep early and rise early. The children start school at 9AM, but they spend the morning together chatting and laughing and enjoying each other’s company. It’s actually quite beautiful to watch. They all seem to be very happy even with the little that they have and how challenging minuscule tasks seem to be. These things that I take for granted such as brushing my teeth, using the toilet, and finding my way around my house after the sun is down, and so on.

I decided for my first week, while in the home stay, I would relax my diet just a bit to be able to live and eat like the typical Nepalese family do.

Normally, I am a bit of a health freak. I follow a firm vegan diet, based around my blood type and ayurvedic body type. I do not eat any animal products (meat, fish, milk, butter, or eggs) and I also do not eat gluten (wheat or white flour products). I avoid white sugar or anything packaged or with additives. I consume a vast array of colorful vegetables on a daily basis (greens being my favorite), and balanced proportions of fats, proteins, and grains, such as quinoa or brown rice. I do my best to eat the correct food combinations and I also take a daily supplement of B-12 and probiotics. I like to start my morning with hot water with bee pollen and also like to finish the day the same way. Some say I am a picky eater, I say I am a smart eater.

You are what you eat. =)

Having said that, my week has been far from my usual diet; I decided that I would write down everything I ate for the full seven days. The mother always made up my plate for me, so I always ate what was given to me.

Day 1 & 2- I was still quite ill, so I was only able to consume about a cup of plain white rice throughout the two days.

Day 3- Breakfast: ¼ c of dal (lentil) soup, 1 cup white rice, 1 tbsp spinach

Lunch: packaged noodles (top ramen)

Dinner: Slice of white bread with potatoes and rice

Day 4- Breakfast: Three slices of white bread, potatoes, dal and white rice

Lunch: One slice of white bread

Dinner: ¾ c soybeans and 1 cup white rice

Day 5- Breakfast: Two slices of white bread, 1 tbsp spinach, rice and dal

Lunch: I buckled and bought a bag of almonds in town and a banana

Dinner: 1 cup of white rice seasoned with turmeric

Day 6- Breakfast: dal and rice

Lunch: Tibetan soup (rice noodle soup)

Dinner: a few mushrooms with white rice

Day 7- Breakfast: 1 cup of white rice, dal, and potatoes

Lunch: two wheat chipatas filled with potatoes

Dinner: white bread

After 7 full days of eating this way, I am in shock (mentally and physically). My body is not happy with me, and I am going through immense culture shock for the first time in my life. I am in disbelief that people are able to eat just white bread, rice, potatoes, and lentils day after day after day. I feel that I am missing so many important nutrients. And I am realizing how unbelievably spoiled I am. I eat plates piled high with vegetables and fruit, and a wide variety of different beans, nuts, seeds, grains, and so on. I am leaving tomorrow for the mountain side and plan spending the following 7 days cleansing my body of all the gluten and additives I have consumed. I feel like such a brat even writing that because my home stay probably has no idea that I felt this way. But this has been a huge eye-opener for me. And another reminder not to take anything I am blessed with for granted. I am a very privileged woman growing up in the United States. I have drinkable tap water, showers (hot showers), fresh fruits and vegetables, electricity, transportation, and so on.

Wow, just wow.

two thousand and twelve.

For many years now I have been fascinated and curious about the truth: Why am I here? What is my purpose? I have searched and searched and read plenteous literature on the meaning of life and have passionately studied metaphysics and philosophy to further apply these theories to life itself. I have discussed and compared my thoughts with many other people's thoughts and beliefs. Although each were very unique to their own, I still continued to dig deeper into the unknown. Accordingly, during this search I have been lead into pure bliss and also in the opposite direction of pain and suffering. I have questioned reality, resulting in deep depression and loneliness.

Up until the 31^st December 2011, I was still very unsure of the truth. With my full trust in the Universe, I was presented with a glorious gift. I was offered to be part of something much bigger than myself, something even bigger than Earth itself. Ayahuasca is her name. Within minutes after consuming her medicine,on the eve of the new year, my life began to profoundly change. My subconscious mind was awakened and I transcended into ecstasy. Many things that I questioned were answered. And once again, on the 4^th of January I consumed a second dose of her medicine. My meditation was taken deeper than ever before into my subconscious mind, which lasted several hours into the night. Numerous revelations occurred in the process, and as the sun rose the morning of the 5^th I felt its warmth on my human flesh and deep into my soul. I mindfully placed my hands under the Earth's soil and the vibrations sent shivers down my spine. My life at that moment was pure bliss. And any doubts that I have ever had about who I am or why I am here have been extinguished.

I am alive. I am conscious. I am pure love and light. I am here now.

I have a very specific mission here on Earth and it was made very clear to me. Consequently the way I spend my time here on Earth (which may be ending very soon, so I must act quickly and proficiently) is going to change. Most changes are not drastic but just reassured.

Unfortunately, there may be people from my past that can not respect my new lifestyle changes, yet I can not look back only NOW and ahead.

-First, the consumption of alcohol, marijuana and all other drugs (coffee/caffeine in small amounts, used medicinally, slowly and thoroughly enjoyed is ok) will no longer be part of my life. I recognize now that every single bad situation that I have experienced in my life (from childhood on) have been a direct reaction from the consumption of alcohol and/or other drugs. Alcohol does not chemically set well in my body. I feel quickly ill both physically and mentally when alcohol has been consumed. The use of marijuana has caused false illusions in reality; insinuating blocks in my meditation and vibrations.

-Next, my body is a temple and should be treated as one. I am a masterpiece. God never gives birth to anything less than that. We are all created in God's image, we are a manifestation of the divine here on Earth. I must fully love myself and give my Earthly body only the best products. Only eating the freshest, organic, closest to nature foods. Physical exercise, listening to my body, fasting, massage and sleep are very important. Following a healthy sleep cycle that coincides with the sun and moon's cycle are vital for good health as well.

-With that said, everything I consume must first consecrate. I must never eat without first praying with a feeling of humbleness and gratitude.

-Everyday I must show appreciation and gratitude to all the blessings in my life and remind myself how fortunate I am to have fresh food, water, shelter, clothing and good health.

-Everyday I must work hard on myself spiritually. Meditation and mindfulness are the keys in the next dimension. I must always be conscious, awake and here now. I must suppress the ego.

-Everyday I should live without anger. What does anger result in besides complicating life and creating wasted energy and eventually leading to war.

-Everyday I must live patiently and with no worries. When I worry I am not trusting in the Universe and not accepting what is going to happen.

-Everyday I will practice Oneness. We are all brothers and sisters- we are mirrors of each other, all reflections of each other. Everyday I will practice ahimsa, generosity and kindness.

-Everyday I will practice non-attachment. I was sent to Earth with everything that I need in order to accomplish my mission. I will always have everything that I need.

-Lastly, and most importantly, communication. Speech is a very powerful tool and should not be taken for granted nor should it be abused. For instance, if several people throughout the day told you that you do not look well, by the time you got home from your day, chances are you will not be feeling well. Speech and the mind are VERY powerful. I will only speak when necessary and meaningful. I will speak clearly, softly and gentle. When I speak it will not be slandering of others, rather encouraging virtue by speaking only about good qualities of others. Gossip and exaggeration are also to be eliminated from my life.

I am very confident in my decision to follow these new lifestyle doctrines. I am also very grateful for all the support from my loved ones at this time in my life. I am blessed in many ways. Gracias.

If I die before I wake

Each morning when I wake up, I consciously and mindfully breathe the prana in deeply, I gently place my feet onto Mother Earth and give her a little massage with each step, I stretch my body using sun salutations and smile in gratitude and appreciation for yet another day of life on Earth. I am never certain I will get another opportunity to rise the next day, since inevitably one day I am going to die. All beings eventually shed their mortal bodies, their memories, abilities, thoughts, feelings, knowledge, leaving their earthly achievements behind them and dissolve in eternity. Never in history has there been a sentient behind whose life did not end with death. People try many methods to prevent death from occurring, but it is impossible. No medicine can cure us of death.

Although I have many dreams for the future [Including more travel, learning and growing, and eventually settling down near the sea or tucked away in a lush forest setting, building my own earthen home with an art and music studio, creating a food garden, keeping bees and chickens, and falling asleep in the hammock hanging from my verandah under the stars and waking up to fresh, crisp mornings; and even one day, being a wife and mother. Yet, this is all still a dream. And tomorrow is uncertain.

I have been spending the last week with a Buddhist monk, he was actually the inspiration for this blog post since I have been talking to him a lot about death and the afterlife. I have had many questions for him, for instance, I often wonder why people fear death. What is there to fear? If you are connected to the hara, which is your center between body and soul, then the fear of death is extinguished. And if you are always living in the now and refraining from committing negative actions, then you will have no accumulated negative karma. There will be no worries. Pi Nan, the monk, told me yesterday that people who are afraid of death are carrying around a gigantic ego, they believe they are greater than the Universal energy. At the end of the day, we are all One, we are just made up of the Earth's elements and when we die those elements are returned to Earth. And people who beg to go somewhere after death, i.e. heaven, then those people are greedy in this desire. Pi Nan told me people who just accept death and are at peace with it and not worried about what happens after, live a much better life on Earth and possibly the afterlife.

With that said, if I die today, it would be ok. I would want my family and friends to know that my life up till this exact moment has been nothing but magic and filled with so much love. And, the only wish I would leave behind for my family would be to keep traveling for me. Each year, make it a point to pick another country on the map and go. Take time off work and GO. And dont just say you will go there next year, actually go and immerse yourself in the beauty, culture, and eat delicious, exotic foods. Oh, and please cremate me and take me with you! Spread me in all the different countries you go to and places that make you smile and feel at peace in your heart. Traveling has changed my life and I want everyone I know to experience that same change--That same rush I get every time I step my foot on land I have yet to see and explore.

culture shock or not?

some highlights, favorite things about SE Asia &/or even little reminders that I am here...

-Spending more than $5 (150BHT) is expensive
-Tiger balm cures all.
-I can leave my backpack somewhere for hours, and just have hope that it is there when I return.
-You must take your shoes off to enter every building (and then I usually forget to put them back on when I leave)
-Taking a warm shower is a luxury.
-I can say please and thank you in several languages, but when it comes time to use it, I mix up which country and language to use.
-Most of what I eat is a mystery.
-Sunblock and bug spray have become the most vital items on this trip.
-Nothing I purchase is done without negotiation.

-Getting excited when the tiolet supplies toilet paper.

-A cockroach runs across the table while eating, I shrug and continue eating.
-A fly is floating in my soup, i pick it out, and continue eating.
-In one day, I can take a bus, ferry, train and plane.
-The excitement of knowing tomorrow I will be in a different country.
-The tour guide who treks the entire mountain in flip flops, all while smoking his cigarette.
-The small shrines on every corner, outside every noodle shop and on every dash board.

ahhh, how i love this continent. its people, culture & food.

My future career(s).

The final week is here and I am anxiously writing my final paper; however my mind is all over the place, so I figured I would take the time to ‘release’ in my blog. I have discovered in the past couple of years that the best way for me to ‘vent’ is through the following: making art & crafts, exercise-swimming, running & cycling, meditation and lastly, WRITING. If I am feeling overwhelmed, just through the act of writing and just letting my mind flow freely, even if it consists of grammatical errors and is incomprehensible, it allows my scattered, ambiguous mind to settle. On some occasions, I write simply about the moment I am in and other times I write about daydreams and created goals for myself, whether on a weekly basis or life basis. In addition, sometimes-creating checklists for myself are helpful as well.

For this blog, I have decided to answer the question that I have been asked over and over this past month, which is… ‘What do you plan on doing with your newly received master’s degree…” Although the question is expected, I still become rather uneasy when answering it. People always want to hear that I am doing something BIG within my recently mastered field, yet for me that is not the case. I love art and especially, modern & contemporary art history. When a passionate lecturer presents new information on artist’s philosophies and significance (especially modern artist) I cannot help but yearn to know more and more and more. I love the field and particularly love when other people are just as passionate about it and teach me everything they know. I want to be THAT person. I want to be a lecturer. Most people do not realize this about me, until they join me in an exhibition at one of the local museums/galleries. I always feel it necessary to share all the information I know about each piece for other’s to fully appreciate what is directly in front of them. Some people enjoy museum visits with me and not having to read any of the plaques because I can usually sum up every painting on the ‘modern’ floor of the museum, others maybe don’t but I just cannot help myself sometimes. Anyways, art history is a passion of mine, I am not sure, at this time, if I will ever become a curator or some big shot art historian, but what I do know is that I would be more than happy to spend a day once a week giving talks/education at a museum, or possibly lecturing one a week at my local community college. I think it would be amazing to keep up with recent sources and information, and be able to teach what I know to others whom are eager to know more.

With that said, art history is not my only passion. I have many other things that I want to do with my life. For instance, YOGA! I love yoga, including the yoga lifestyle and philosophy. It will be a practice I participate in until the day I die. After March, I will be a certified yoga instructor. With my newly achieved certification I hope to also teach weekly yoga classes, either in a studio or gym facility. However, I am actually hoping to be in a gym facility for many reasons. First, I know a lot of people that want to incorporate yoga into their exercise routine but the inconvenience of having to go to a separate facility can sometimes cause a damper on that, time wise and financial wise. Also, others that may have never tried yoga will be more willing to hop right into a class that is about to begin. ‘Why not?..’ Might be there thinking. In addition, if I teach at a gym, then I may also benefit and receive a free gym pass; Also, I would love to teach other aerobic classes such as spin, zumba and water aerobics. I have worked in a gym before and do have experience creating personalized workout and meal plans. I would like to include fitness and yoga into my ‘career’.

Furthermore, I do have a few other passions, which I would like to include in my ‘career’ path, which are in the fields of healing and human rights. I will begin by explaining my ideas for healing; I would like to work with children in the field of art therapy and creating. I love self-expression and being able to heal wounds using creativity. I would really love to learn more about the field of psychology and child development, coinciding with art therapy. I am hoping to further my education in this field once I return to the states next year. Hopefully with that, I will be able to begin my own practice or find work within the field. Also, I will be a reiki master by the end of this year and be able to heal within my own private practice.

Lastly, human rights; I truly believe that all human beings on planet earth have the right to: education-especially children, all should have the right to seek, receive and impart information and ideas without fear or interference. Human beings deserve the right to live with dignity: NO ONE should be denied their rights to adequate housing, food, water, sanitation, education and health care. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. We live on a very resource-dense planet with ample amounts of food and water; in addition, daily advancements are being made in technology, Therefore, there are no excuses. I would like to invest my life in helping to make this possible. I am fully aware that planet Earth is gigantic and there is no way that I can make a huge impact, but even if I am able to be a small asset, even within my own town- that would be satisfying enough. If I can help one family go from homeless and starving to safe and healthy, I will do that. I would like to apply to work for habitat for humanity, or other programs striving to promote basic human rights.

The above information is extensive and is not coinciding necessarily, hence why I am hesitant to address the question, ‘what are you doing with your degree..?’ I often sum it up with, ‘well, I would like to be an educator, artist, healer and activist, but also a world traveler—and maybe even a wife and mother one day.’ People must think I am foolish, but give me ten years and I have no doubts that my life wont be exactly as I have just written it out to be.

You asked: I respond (with this blog)--Going Veggie?

Once a week, I receive a message from a friend, or a friend of a friend, asking me questions about my vegan diet, typically it starts with… ‘I have been thinking about going vegetarian, but not sure where to begin, could you please send me some information..’ and although this message makes me gleam, and I take heaps of pride in my response, I feel as though I am always repeating the same message over and over again, so I have decided to write this blog post in order to respond all at once, and next time I receive that message, I can just forward this entry (feel free to also send it to friends).

Alrighty, I will begin with the basics. Vegetarianism is the practice of following a plant-based diet with the inclusion of dairy products and/or eggs.

However, veganism (which I am) encompasses a diet free from all animal-products. I do, however, eat honey (and that is a whole different point-which I will happily answer if you are wondering why I choose to support honey).

I also attempt to eat a mostly raw diet, which makes up 50% of my diet. I eat uncooked fruits, veggies—or just cooked slightly.

Buddhist vegetarians do not eat onion or garlic & macrobiotic diets consist mostly of whole grains and beans (which I actually do not recommend).

A compliment that I receive quite frequently is that ‘I look healthy for a vegan.’ Of course I look healthy is my response. I have lower levels of cholesterol and lower blood pressure. My chances of heart disease, diabetes, osteoporosis, and Alzheimer’s disease (which is mad cow disease in humans) are much lower than most meat eaters.

With that said, If I am not fully aware of the foods I consume than none of the above would be true. It is easy and very possible to be an unhealthy vegetarian/vegan, or what I like to call ‘a junk food vegetarian.’

Which includes vegetarians that eat pasta, bread, chips & fries as meals. This makes me incredibly sad. Where is the protein? Where are the vegetables? Or the healthy fats? Of course, you aren’t going to look well OR feel well. Many people tell me, I tried to go vegetarian once, but I was always hungry, low on energy, and never felt well. And then when I ask what they ate, they tell me they just cut out all the meat, but what about substitutions? What about supplements (if you are not sure you are getting it from food)? –which leads to b12—you must take a supplement for this vitamin, its most difficult to achieve adequate amounts from a plant-based diet. And food combination is very important:

Food combinations in protein sources:

(There are 23 different types of amino acids that our bodies need- in order to do everything from forming skin, organs, blood cells, and the immune system, to creating hormone neurotransmitters.)

Many protein sources are incomplete, but with the correct food combination can be complete, however, there are some food sources that are complete (all on their own)

And these include:

-Quinoa: some consider it a grain, however it is actually a seed. But I eat quinoa in substitution for rice. It is easier to digest (gluten-free) and has a nutty flavor. I actually prefer to cook it than let it cool and eat it at room temperature.

-Lupin, soy, hempseed, chia seed, amaranth, & buckwheat are all complete.

I add chia seed to almost everything I eat. It’s so small, and in my opinion, does not have much taste, that I do not even notice it is there. And amaranth is sooo good with fresh fruit salad.

-Avocado: I eat avocado almost everyday. Somedays, more than once. But it is high in fat, so if I eat more than half an avo in a day, then I make sure to cut back on all my other fat sources throughout the day. Avocado is soooo good for digestion.

-Miso: another good for digestion food—fermented foods all are. One day, I will eat a diet which is mostly fermented, once I am more settled and have the time to make all my own miso, kombucha, kimchi, and so on.

-Coconut: I WISH I had a coconut tree. I could live off coconut milk.

-Beetroot: my favorite as a juice AND grated up in salads. Heaps of antioxidants & makes your liver HAPPY.

Food Combos: (to create complete protein)

grains with legumes i.e. almond butter & grainy bread, rice & beans, tofu & rice/pasta

grains with nuts & seeds i.e. grainy bread w/sesame seeds, rice w/sesame seeds

legumes with nuts & seeds i.e. hummus (chickpeas & tahini) or trail mix (nuts w/seeds)

If you eat dairy and egg products than you are receiving complete proteins.

However, I would highly recommend cutting out dairy and only eating free-range eggs if you must.—you can message me for more information on going vegan.

Other worries as a vegetarian are: iron, calcium, fatty acids, and vitamin D (but no need to worry, all can be found in foods--i have listed some below).

Iron—black beans, lentils, oatmeal, raisins, black-eyed peas, soybeans, chick peas, tomato juice, whole-wheat breads, cashews, hempseed, kidney beans, tempeh, molasses and thyme.

Calcium—leafy greens, ie. collard greens, kale, spinach, bok choy, etc., tempeh and tofu (soy).

Fatty Acids—soy, walnuts, pumpkin seeds, hempseed, kiwi, and my favorites: AVOCADO, flaxseed (oil), chia seeds, algae (seaweed)—and spirulina.

Vitamin D- THE SUN!!! soy milk & mushrooms.

I do not support ‘Gardenburger’ or any of those ‘fake meats’ --I did when I first became a vegetarian, but once I started reading labels and learned that there were more added (unknown) ingredient than actual veggies, I stopped and started making my own veggie burgers out of beans, seeds and vegetables. I make heaps all at once, and then freeze them for easy eats. Also, it is not necessary, but I try to avoid gluten as much as possible and eat Ezekiel breads and spelt pasta, and QUINOA. Yum.

Overall, in my (self-educated health knowledge) I highly recommend (common sense) drinking lots of water and EXERCISE. Spend at least twenty minutes in the sun a day, and smile often. Try your best to eat organic and raw as often as possible. Also, eat LOCAL & if possible, grow all your own fruits & veggies (at least your own herbs).

Also, include these (ancient)SUPERFOODS into your diet (even if you aren’t veggie)!

-Blue green algae/spirulina/wheat grass/kelp/dulse/alfalfa

-Acai & gogi

-Chia seeds

-Maca/raw cacao/dark chocolate

-Bee pollen

-Green tea

-Quinoa, rice bran

-Ginger, turmeric, cinnamon, cayenne & aloe

Well, I hope this information above helps, and although I might have sound annoyed in wanting to create this blog, I truly do not mind the questions. I will happily answer each and every one of them. Health is very important to me, not only for myself but also for others. Also, I am no one trained/educated in any of the above information. It is all very subjective & my own opinion, so if you do not agree with any of it, that is fine as well. =)

First (Rough Draft) Itinerary: next 6 months

it is all coming together, these are all my DREAM locations for the next several months. (i dont have enough time for burma or laos, but those are also on the dream list... i am definetely open for suggestions/spontaneousness--already talking to a girl that lives on an island off phuket, she lives in a treehouse && originally from san diego--she has offered me a place with her, sounds too amazing.. I CAN NOT WAIT! i fly into kuala lumpur--then train to krabi, thailand. from there i will explore thailand for 60 days (my visa allowance), then cambodia, vietnam, singapore, 30 days in nepal (visa restrictions), followed by India (40 days) then back to new zealand and australia for graduation. i leave sydney in 1 week & 5 days to begin my adventures!

20NovKUALA LUMPUR—21Nov (60 days)KRABI: Koh Lanta Island

PHUKET(islands): kho phi phi (2weeks exploring islands)

à Surat Thani

Ko Samui Islands

Surat ThaniàKoh Phangan (Reiki) 2 weeks 5Dec-16Dec

Ko Taoà

Chumphonà Hua Hin, Nakon PathomàBangkok

Bangkokà Ayutthaya, Lopburi, Phitsanulok, Lamphunà day in each

Chaing Mai 23 Dec (one week)

CHAING RAI 29 Dec (one week)

Mae Hong Son: Pai 6Jan (one week)

OVERNIGHT TRAIN

Train back to Bangkok 16 Jan

Bangkokà 18JanAranayaprathet/Poiphet, Cambodia 19 Jan

Siem Reap (Angkor Wat) 20 Jan

Phnom Penh 23 Jan

Saigon, Vietnam 26 Jan

Muong Man, Nha Trang, Dieu Tri, Quang Ngai, HOI AN, DANANG, HUE(perfume river), dong hoi, vinh, HANOI --one week to make way to Hanoi

Flight to Singapore 2/3Feb

Singapore to India/Nepal 6Feb

Nepal 30 days, India 40 days (30 days-yoga)

India 6-14 Aprilà New Zealand/Australia

the greatest response [of all time]

in response to telling my cousin how stressed i am about uni finals, here is what he had to say:

[i must say, it is the highlight of my week]

"couldnt imagine being in school....but think of all the beauty and bliss around you! While others are stuck in there 9 to 5's listening to boring American accents. You are in a world of its own, a tiny Island of English prisoners who named themselves Australians and starting talking different. A place where drinking is always important, as well as the beach and sex! Attractive people wander in flocks like the Antelope in the Savannah! No time is a bad time except for the worst times. you will be fine my dear, know that you could be in small town Mississippi smoking dope and working in a coffee shack. But you have excelled your mind, body and soul to a better place. you are doing this for you and flipping the rest of the world the bird. There isnt a person you know that would not be in your shoes happily, "unless they are those Pumas you got from Italy that are still in my closet cause I cant get rid of them". Study in peace my young lion cub, for one day. You will be on the hunt with the pack wishing you were just a seedling again, who have not sprouted...Be free and be easy...As only you can be!! (but not easy sexually)"

your cousin like a brother
ET

we are just a spec in time

If I AM just a spec in time, then these next 2 weeks are basically non-existent, which for me, at this moment, is daunting. I am doing my best to not become overwhelmed, but I am right on the edge. I have three major papers to write. The one I am currently writing is on Suprematism and The Black Square, although I am fascinated by the topic, I am struggling to fully wrap my head around the concepts. I am getting there, but it’s challenging on a philosophical level. The next is on film & the music industry. I choose the topic for this paper and I am looking forward to its subject matter, however not sure where to start and what my argument will be; and lastly, the art market in the 18^th century—this one, I am not looking forward to. It is really difficult to find information on the art market at this time, since majority of work was commissioned by the elite, and not just the everyday man, but I am just going to have to dig deep, since I have no choice, and have to write the paper. Well, that is it for Uni, however my personal life is just as full. There are many things I want to accomplish before leaving Sydney; first, I need to continue to work in order to save the money I need for my future adventures. I work Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday. I asked to work more hours the next two weeks, so that should get interesting since I have many events coming up: acupuncture appointments, graduation pictures, dubstep night, spirit fest, drum circle/meditation night, noodles in Hyde park, gong night, and multiple paintings and my art journal which I need to complete within the next few days. All while attempting to sell & give away most of the things I own and pack for my journey and enjoy the beautiful summer weather we are having in Coogee at the moment. Oh yeah, and not forgetting to breathe as well. I know in three weeks time when I am sitting on the beach in Byron Bay doing absolutely nothing, I will just look back and laugh, but at this present moment I am at boiling point.

This Months Forecast

This is it--It’s game time! I have approached my last full month of Sydney, Uni and work; my last full month to complete everything I have come to Australia for. I have final assessments due and the closing to another chapter in my life and the beginning of another one.

In the last year, as most know, I have become increasingly more interested in astrology. I have studied the sun, moon and ascending signs and have practiced my knowledge of them on all the new people I have come to meet this year. To my surprise, it is quite remarkable how similar most are to their ‘sign.’ I have found that certain signs play out their description perfectly with the people I meet. For instance, Pisces have characteristics that I just adore-they are spontaneous and have a worry-free demeanor, they are accepting, compassionate, and will go out of their way for a friend. I love Pisces, yet I find their carefree attitude just a bit too carefree. And then there are cancer- my favorite of all. They are always dependable, and I always know I can count on a cancer to be there for me when I need them the most. Super compassionate and always positive. If I had a choice, I would make sure to marry a cancer, I think they would make the best life partner. And then there is the Gemini, I tend to be attracted to Gemini men, something about their charm, wittiness, and adventurous nature that I am just drawn to, yet Gemini men always tend to be the master of persuasion. I have to work extra hard not to let this charm influence me because I know it won’t end well. Overall, (and please no one take this personally or offensively) Aries and Sagittarius are a bit too intense for me ALL THE TIME; Libras, Aquarius, and Taurus are a bit too unreliable; Virgos play follow the leader; Capricorns don’t know how to take risks; I admire Leo’s confidence, but it can also be taken too far; and then the Scorpio—a bit too complicated. And Yes, I am a Scorpio, and yes I relate to many of the characteristics as well. Scorpios are so unstable and unforgiving. I am aware that the last several sentences may sound a bit negative, nevertheless, I do find it exceptionally interesting that people are so unique and each posses many differences. Even though Aries and Sagittarius are intense, they are the best to party with and are ever so generous; Libras, Aquarius, and Taurus are always so peaceful and grateful; Virgos always have a logical answer, they think logic not emotion, which is so helpful because my emotions seem to get the best of me majority of the time; Capricorns are drama-free; and Leos are the most loyal, caring, honest friends. They are there when you need them and extremely forgiving, and respect everyone’s differences. In general, I love all the people I have met this year and am grateful that the Universe has placed each and every one of them in my path. My year here in Australia would be insignificant without all of them.

At this point, I am going to explore what to expect this upcoming month, given that tomorrow is the first day of October. From viewing the sun and moon chart, we all should be expecting several things: Firstly, this will be a time period wherein many of us will become more clear regarding our personal needs within the context of our relationships, and be given ample opportunity to express them. If you are excited about changing the way you do things (making a living, relate to a partner, maintain health, etc.) and are open to experimenting and reaching outside your safety zone into the unfamiliar, then this will be a great month. This month as Venus, Mercury, and then the Sun move through Scorpio we are being asked to create and master new ways of “co-fulfilling” ourselves, that is to totally be there for another without giving ourselves away. There will be a need to confront and repeatedly put yourself out there –it is life testing your resolve, integrity, and maturity-continue to deal with it and don’t give up. By the end of the month with the new Moon and Venus square Mars the energy can become progressively explosive. The rising energy can contribute to amazing experiences of ultimate union.

This month I have to keep in mind that the only constant is change and the Universe is completely and utterly supporting me in ways I cannot even imagine and every experience I am having, including all the bumps in the road, are all strategically placed there for a reason, they all serve to awaken and stimulate rather than bother and irritate. I look forward to the journey that lies ahead of me and hope you all do as well.

Eleven months later

It's slightly strange to think that I have been out of the United States for close to a year now. I had wanted to get out of the country for good for a very long time. There were so many things that made me unhappy about the United States, however, now being gone for so long, I am able to have a better 'outsiders' position, and although there still are many things that upset about the politics, there are heaps of things i truly miss (and cannot live without forever):

- The most obvious: my brother, family & friends---

[I miss seeing my brother on a daily basis, I miss our lunch dates, I miss sing a-longs in the car with him, I miss macbook photo shoots, I miss late-night chats and him forcing me to watch something funny on either: comedy central or youtube, I miss being able to vent to him and cooking him dinners.

I miss my dad and his silliness. I miss beach bike rides with him & breakfast at coco's. I even miss his cleanliness--and obsession with washing my clothes for me, my car and my dirty feet, hehe.

My mom--I miss coming home to her asleep on the couch and telling her to go to bed and her telling me she was just resting her eyes--then coming back 2 hours later and her telling me the same story again. I miss my mom's cooking (especially her cornbread) and conversations with her. I miss her trying to convince me to go with her to the latest Jackson "event," and I miss her silliness as well.

Aunts, Uncles, Cousins---I miss family get-togethers!!

Friends--I miss going out or staying in--I miss lunch dates, going to shows & random roadtrips!!]

-My own ‘real’ big bed, instead of my blow-up mattress-- I miss a big comfy bed with lots of pillows and a big warm blanket

-Spontaneous trips to New Orleans

-High noon café’s vegan: Caesar dressing, beet burger & carrot cake--daily lunches!!

-Soup & Salad (all-you-can-eat) Restaurants: i.e. Souplantation & Jasons Deli

-Extremely large coffees & free refills (drip coffee)-- I have not had drip coffee in forever!

-Burritos! & Chips & salsa, corn tortillas (Mexican food, in general)

-Black beans

-Bananas and berries

-Unlimited broadband Internet

-Music stations: Pandora, last fm, etc.

-Knowing which way to look when crossing the road-- I always think I am gonna get hit since pedestrians do not come first in this country.

-Insulated homes/buildings--i am so tired of being cold

-Low priced everything: housing, food, etc.---this country is soooo expensive

-Silk Almond milk

-Good tasting drinkable tap water

-Z’s instead of ‘s & no extra u’s in color & favorite

-Not having to spell my last name: g-o-n-ZED-ale-ZED

-Boys who hold doors open for ladies-- it just doesnt exist here.

alienation from contemporary society

its official: i miss my dreads. let the dreading process begin [again].

the real reason i am going back to asia

some of you might think i am going back to asia in order to learn more, experience, sightsee, grow spiritually... but the real reason is the food (hehe): panang curry, green & red curry, tom yum soup, chili basil stir fry, pad thai, seaweed soup, rice paper rolls, tofu kaprow, glass noodles, jungle curry, black sticky rice w/mango, fresh juices, kombucha, fresh coconut (straight from the tree), green papaya salad, green tea, jasmine rice, watercress fi dang, spicy black bean eggplant, hot & sour soup, tofu satay, fat rice noodles, lemon grass noodle soup, green mango salad..... ohhhhh my goodness, i cannot wait!

bucketlist.

i have written several bucket lists in my lifetime, but recently my roommate laura has inspired me to take a look back at my old lists, check off the things i have accomplish [surprisingly, i have accomplished almost everything on my last list: visit the sistine chapel, teach english in foreign country, masters degree, climb the rock of gibraltar, scuba dive the great barrier reef, build a cob house... just to name a few] && i have created a new one--all the things i want to accomplish before turning thirty [november 18, 2015]. i have four years & a few weeks to check off the following dreams:

-Absolutely 100% loving my body/appearance: release negative emotions and limiting beliefs

-Visit the White House

-Brew my own beer

-Become a wine connoisseur

-Disney World (Florida)

-Alaska

-Fly first class

-Find a red pogo stick (like the one I had as a kid)

-Maine & Vermont: Route 100 in the autumn

-Canada (Road trip from West Coast to East Coast)

-Spend a year backpacking from Central to South America

-Carnival in Rio

-try DMT (just once)

-Eat Kiwi in New Zealand

-Cruise from Patagonia to Antarctica

-Become fluent in Spanish

-Visit Jerusalem

-Become a Reiki Master

-Spend a New Year’s Eve in Time Square

-Full Moon Party: Thailand

-Buy and restore a vintage VW bus

-Complete a triathlon

-Burning Man Festival

-Build/Keep a bee hive

-Start a soup kitchen

-Build a backyard adobe oven

-Teach yoga (Certification in India)

-Scandinavia & Iceland: Northern Lights

-Visit London & Barcelona

-Have a successful vegetable/fruit/herb garden

-Own happy (egg-laying) chickens

-Hulahooping: be able to bring the hoop from my ankles back up to my neck

-Motorbike license: Own a vespa

-Fall in Love

-See Bjork live

-Learn the banjo

-Design an Exhibition (for a well-known museum)

-Work for Habitat for Humanity

-Skydive w/Laura

-Sneak into Cuba

-Jamaica (& Islands) for the Summer

-Finish paperwork for EU Passport

-Go to a raw food party hosted by David Wolfe

-Have a one year lease on an apartment: somewhere near the sea.

Well, there is the list folks. I will post an updated list every so often till everything is checked off. Looking forward to experiencing every single one of these.